Self-Interview 7

Hi How are you today ?

Okay I guess.

You guess ?


What’s wrong ?

Nothing. I just wonder why I have to be such a pain with guys just so they understand that we are JUST friends, nothing more.

What do you mean by being a pain ?

Usually I would let things slide, letting time take care of it. I would assume the guy would get a clue. I never touch him, don’t say sweet words, back off when he comes too close, say things like « Hum, No. » when he makes jokes about we getting a coffee or a massage, I’ll say a coffee will be better. But I really have to be blunt lately and it pisses me off. I say to guys right off the bat that I’m single by choice and I don’t intend things to change. I would think it’s clear enough !

Where are you being a pain in what you just said ?

Ah hum. Well, I have to repeat like at least three times that we are just friends, taking all the fun out of him having his fun i.e making stupid sexual innuendos or invites.

Nothing wrong with being clear is there ?

Guess not. It’s my fault for ever thinking that guys and girls can be friends. I thought that maybe if things were clear from the start it would be simpler but it’s not it seems. If I don’t talk they think I’m mad, if I talk too much they say to shut up, and they think it’s okay to say I look bad, I’m stupid or whatever. Which it’s not okay to say to friends.

Maybe they treat you like a guy ?

How can it be a guy thing to say you look really nice today then say that something you just said is completely stupid ? It is a guy thing but it is clearly NOT like he acts as if I was a guy.

Do you want those « friends » to treat you like a guy ?

Yes. No. Well, I would like them to see me as a computer, no sex. No sexual tension. No punching. No verbal insults. No expectations. I don’t expect them to talk as much as me or to come shopping with me do I ?!

No ?

NO !

What do you expect from guys as friends ?

To be friends goddamnit ! I expect them to be friendly and treat me with respect. I expect them to stop walking on their toes around me, stop treating me like a vase, stop thinking I’m mad because I don’t talk. Do I nag them about their feelings and silence and hygiene and their very poor fashion style ? NO. Why don’t they just say hello, how are you and leave it at that until real conversation starts. Friendships weren’t built in a day you know.

Wouh, you are pissed.

YEAH I am.